EdificeWrecks's blog

President Ushers in New Era of Corporate Socialism
Fat Lady Heard Warming Up

PA Newswire
Washington DC
Sept. 20, 2008
By Ed Wrecks - Chief Financial Correspondent

After thirty years of progressively removing restrictions on the banking, insurance and mortgage industries that inhibited competition and the formation of “innovative new financial products”, those industries, over the last few weeks, have heard the words that visionary President Ronald Reagan called the nine most terrifying words in the English language – “I'm from the government and I'm here to help”.

The government of Socialist President George W. Bush decisively acted to nationalize the financial industry. “This is a good deal for the American people”, Bush said. He added that “Everybody knows that bankers make a lot of money and now all Americans are bankers”. “This is the culmination of our plan to make America the ‘Ownership Society’”, he said.

Additionally, he announced that we would borrow another $700 Billion from Burkina Faso and Burundi to purchase the remaining “innovative financial products” from financial institutions that didn’t want to totally sell-out to the government. The President explained that, “By removing these ‘innovative financial products’ from the books of these institutions we are letting the management of these companies off the hook for marketing these product to people they knew couldn’t afford them so they can focus their creativity on more innovation that will stimulate the economy. Besides, by putting this purchase on our MasterCard, we are picking up a ton of frequent flyer miles and cell-phone minutes. It is a win-win all around.”

Accompanying Bush at his news conference was his senior financial advisor and McCain financial strategist, former Republican Senator Phil “Americans are just whiners” Graham who authored the bill that repealed the Glass-Stiegel Act, an outmoded Depression Era law that prevented investment banks from doing stupid things that could cause the economy to melt-down. Also on the dais were other members of Bush’s economic brain trust, noted economist and social theoretician J. Elton Miller, CEO of the Veritas Group, and Wile E. Coyote. Coyote gained prominence when he published his economic theory that stated “If you just don’t look down, you won’t fall.” He postulated that the laws of economics (and physics), only come into effect if they are noticed – that as long as a problem is ignored, it can do no harm. Miller is famous for his proposal for a guest worker program for unborn babies so we don't need all of those Mexicans.

Administration officials declined to identify the large woman in the Viking outfit who also accompanied the President, but she was heard doing voice exercises during the presentation.

Thanks to the unfathomable incompetence and hubris of the Bush Administration and their arrogant overreaching in trying to establish a 1000-year Rovian Reich, the Democratic Party is poised to reassume political dominance in America. No doubt, Rahm Emanuel is already patting himself on the back. Not so fast there, Bud.

In order for the resurgence to stick and be sustainable, Democrats must project a vision of America with which most of its citizens can identify.

Republicans have always been better at the “Vision Thing” — except for Bush 41, of course. They have beat the hell out of the Democrats in the bumper sticker wars; projecting simple solutions to complex problems in terms that most people can get their heads around without too much effort. While its implementation was a total flop, the Republicans got a lot of mileage out of their "Contract With America"

Democrats, on the other hand, are long on objectives and programs and short on vision. If you doubt me, just take a look at the party website. On a page called “What We Stand For” is what I guess they consider being their “Vision Statement”:

The Democratic Vision
The Democratic Party is committed to keeping our nation safe and expanding opportunity for every American. That commitment is reflected in an agenda (emphasis added) that emphasizes the security of our nation, strong economic growth, affordable health care for all Americans, retirement security, honest government, and civil rights.

This is followed by a “6-Piont Plan” and a “50 State Strategy”. So, we’ve got an agenda, a plan and a strategy — I’m still looking for the vision.